


Best Friends With Benefits

by Scoobert0



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (2012)
Genre: Friends With Benefits, Humor, M/M, Pre-Slash, Slash, slight canon AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-06-25
Updated: 2012-06-26
Packaged: 2017-11-08 12:08:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,880
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/443040
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Scoobert0/pseuds/Scoobert0
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tony and Clint have become best friends, who also share some benefits. After meeting a certain Captain, Tony finds himself developing a huge crush on him. Clint notices and does what any good friend would do: helps his bro get the guy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> All you need to know is that in this, Clint and Tony have met before the Avengers movie and Tony and Pepper never dated.
> 
> And this is your warning that this is my first attempt at anything that could be considered porn. I'm sorry. So, so sorry. Give me pointers and maybe it will get better in later chapters.

The two figures on the bed moaned and grunted in pleasure as the man on top thrusted into his lover. They exchanged heated, sloppy kisses all while. A few more strokes and they were both shivering out their orgasms with impassioned cries.

The top man rolled off to the side next to his partner. The two of them lay there panting in a post-coital haze. After a few moments the lights in the room brightened a fraction before either of them spoke.

“Huh.” Tony huffed thoughtfully, still catching his breath.

“Huh? All that and all I get is a ‘huh’? You can sure be ungrateful sometimes, Stark.” Clint ragged breathlessly, throwing a grin at the other man in spite of his harsh words.

“What? That was a good ‘huh’. It was a ‘huh, how in the world did he do that thing with his tongue while he was-“

“Uh-huh, sure it was.”

“Oh, so you can’t preen at a compliment anymore, bird brain? I see how it is. Maybe I should start complimenting Natalie, Natasha, whatever the fuck her name really is. She at least knew how to play along.”

“A) She was ordered to play nice with you when that happened, and B) You need to write me into your will before I can allow you to attempt something like that. Seriously. Because I’m only sleeping with you for your money you know.”

“Who doesn’t”

“Oh, don’t bring your self-pitying attitude into this. I thought we had an agreement; when we’re in bed, it’s all about me.” He shifts onto his side towards Tony, who chuckles and rolls so they’re face to face.

“I forgot, my bad.”

“Damn straight your bad.” Clint places a soft kiss on his swollen lips before shifting away and getting out of the bed. Tony makes a sound of disapproval as Clint picks up all his clothes.

“Gotta go in for a debrief with Coulson before that meeting later today.” He explained as he pulled his pants on.

“Debriefed my ass. I know you got a thing for him. You’re such a whore, Barton.” Tony grinned at him, lounging on his side, sharp eyes tracking his movements.

“Look who’s talking, playboy. Don’t forget about the meeting.” He reminded said playboy as he sat on the edge of the bed to put his boots on.

“Oh wait, _that_ meeting is today? I was going to try and finish the Mark VII.” Groaned Tony as he rolled pathetically to Clint’s side of the bed.

“Go ahead then, but when Fury send me to kill you for not showing up, you won’t be able to bribe me with new cars or ridiculous amounts of money. Orders are orders, you know.”

“What about sexual favors?” Tony purred into his ear, suddenly kneeling behind him, “I have it on good authority that I give amazing blow jobs.”

“Well in that case, I wouldn’t be opposed to just breaking your legs instead of putting an arrow through your face.”

“Oh, I see how it is, Hawkass. Go, get out. Do your sneaky super spy slut thing with Coulson.” Declared Tony with an amused smirk, pushing Clint off the bed with one of his feet as he flopped back on the sheets. He grinned back at the man’s splayed form as he stood. Heading towards the door he pauses and turned back.

“So I take it you’ll be in the Garage all night then?”

Tony was sitting up in the middle of the bed, futilely trying to smooth down his perfect sex hair, “Yeah, that’s a safe bet. However, I wouldn’t be opposed to lab sex if, let’s say, someone were to walk in there with nothing on but their undies and a pair of cowboy boots on.”

“You sir, have a fetish.”

“Actually, I have several. Didn’t you get the memo?”

“I think I lost it somewhere. You should probably remind me what they all are again.” Clint waggled his eyebrows suggestively.

“I’ll be sure to schedule it in for sometime soon, promise. Now get lost, some of us have important shit to do.” Tony dismissed the archer, who watched him stumble out of the bed and into the bathroom.

“Don’t forget about the meeting!” Clint managed to shout before the bathroom door shut. He shook his head amusedly before turning and leaving.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was going to say something about this, but I've forgotten. If I think of it, I'll fix it. Till then, enjoy!

Tony leaned against the back wall of the elevator as it shot up to the requested floor. He played with his phone while contemplating what might occur during the upcoming meeting. He’d been briefed on what the Avengers Initiative was basically about (ok, not so much briefed as he’d hacked into S.H.I.E.L.D.’s database and peeked at some of Clint’s ‘eyes only’ documents). It seemed like a novelty idea for the most part. But the lack of any real detail was bothering him. He was nothing if not a stickler for the details.

At least he knew Clint would be there. Coulson too, probably. And Fury. Fucking Fury.

The elevator dinged and the doors opened. Tony pushed himself off the wall and started walking down the corridor, playing with his phone all the way. He went through the last door in the hall without looking up.

“Well I’ll be damned.” A smoky female voice said from across the room. Tony’s eyes shot up to see that it was a red headed woman in a black uniform sitting at a long table that had spoken.

“Oh god, it’s _you_.” He groaned as he pocketed his phone, “If it’s all the same to you, I’d prefer it if you didn’t try and stab me in the neck and try to steal my kidneys this time. And why are you so surprised to see me? I thought you told me there wasn’t anything I could do that would surprise you, agent Romanova.”

“Except you’re early. For a meeting. One that Colonel Fury is going to be at, none the less.” The Widow explained, “Looks like I owe Hawkeye fifty bucks.”

“But, he told me the meeting started at four. Pepper even came down to drag me out of the lab.” He tried to process the new information while keeping an eye on the deadly woman across the room, “That asshole played me, didn’t he?”

“It seems that way. Guess I don’t owe him anything then.” She mused from where she was sitting at the conference table.

Tony took the time to scan the rest of the room and realized that they weren’t alone. He eyed to muscular, blond man sitting at the far end of the table, watching them silently with a judgmental look. Despite that, he wasn’t half bad, as far as looks went. Which was actually an understatement, because he was gorgeous, even for Tony’s standards. But Tony being Tony, he couldn’t let such a judgmental look slide. Before he could ask what his deal was, the door to the room opened.

Coulson headed a small group, raising an eyebrow at Tony as he entered the room. He was followed by a man with glasses and shaggy hair, who looked nervous about something. Tony vaguely recognized him, but couldn’t come up with a name. Clint brought up the rear and swaggered in. Natasha spouted out something in Russian at him, and he raised a hand to his chest like the comment had personally affronted him.

“You never said I couldn’t manipulate him, and anything not said goes.”

“I’m a little upset that you’ve used me like this, honey.” Tony fiend hurt.

“Don’t be that way, snookums, you know I do it because I love you.” Clint put an arm around his shoulders. Ducking out from under his arm quickly, before the archer’s grip tightened and the probability of getting a noogie became a reality, Tony moved forward to take a seat at the table. Clint followed, taking the chair next to his and turning it backwards before perching on it.

“Oh damn, forgot to bring you some crackers, Polly.” Tony teased. The agent shoved his shoulder playfully.

Natasha caught his eye and smiled knowingly at the two of them. He stuck his tongue out at her childishly, while Clint flicked her off. There was a soft disgruntled noise from the end of the table that had the three of them looking to see blondy giving him and Clint a disapproving look.

“What?” Tony asked incredulously before he could stop himself.

“You should be more polite to the lady.” Blondy’s voice was a nice baritone with an underlying authority and, as far as Tony was concerned, sexy as all hell.

Before he could retort, Clint snorted loudly. Blondy shot him a hard look, mouth opening to say something, but Natasha beat him to it.

“Remember that Drag Queen contest S.H.I.E.L.D. had last year, Barton? Hill and I entered it for shits and giggles, but who was it that won again?” She asked coyly.

“Me!” Clint declared excitedly, throwing his hands in the air, “I am the fairest and fiercest queen in the land!”

Tony chuckled and shook his head while blondy gave Clint a look that was equal parts concerned and confused.

“What? Not a RuPaul fan?” The archer asked the bigger man, making Tony laugh out loud.

“Barton.” Coulson rebuked flatly from the head of the table, drawing everyone’s attention, “If nobody minds, I’d like to get started. Colonel Fury is going to be late with our last recruit.

“Now, you all know why you’re here, for the Avenger Initiative. I’ll explain the details shortly, but let’s start off with introductions, shall we?” He waved a hand at the man with the glasses, “This is-“

“Banner!” Tony interrupted loudly, snapping his fingers and pointing at the man, “Dr. Bruce Banner, right? Knew I recognized you. Love your work.”

“Is that so?” Banner watched him dubiously.

“Yeah, definitely. I’m also a fan of how you turn into a huge, green rage monster.”

The doctor huffed a small laugh and smiled tightly at him before looking away. The reaction had him even more interested in the man. He ignored the pinched looks the agents in the room were focusing on the good doctor, like he was going to flip out from the small jest.

“Mr. Stark, I’m asking you right now to not-“ Coulson began.

“It’s fine.” Banner cut in, “I wouldn’t be here if I couldn’t take a little ribbing.”

“You know what, I like you.” Tony praised, smirking. Bruce rolled his eyes at him, but was smiling softly all the same. Tony put a point in his imaginary win column.

“Anyways, Dr. Banner will provide scientific support to the team. He also has… other means of assisting the team if need be, as it’s already been pointed out.

“Moving on,” Coulson said, voice firm, “Two of our top agents will also be joining the team. Natasha Romanova, aka the Black Widow.” Natasha sat in her chair, arms crossed over her chest, “And Clint Barton, aka Hawkeye.” Clint performed a queen’s wave for Banner and Blondy, “They have years of training and experience, full details of their skills will be included with the team portfolios. Trust me when I say they’ll be good assets to the team.”

“Aw, stawp it Phil, you’re making me blush!” Clint gushed theatrically. Natasha flicked something hard at him, making him wince. Coulson ignored them and continued as though nothing was happening.

“This is Tony Stark.” The agent motioned to Tony.

“Love you too man.”

“Owner of Stark Industries and a S.H.I.E.LD. consultant.”

“Oh, I see what I’m worth to you.”

“He also created and pilots the Iron Man armor.”

“There we go!” He smiled cheekily at the senior agent when he glared at him. Turning in his chair, he caught sight of Blondy looking at him with a strange expression, “Ok, now what’s that look for?”

“You wouldn’t happen to be related to Howard Stark by any chance?” The pure hope on the man’s face was confusing Tony royally.

“Uh, yeah, he was my dad. Where have you been the last forty something years?”

Coulson cleared his throat loudly to regain the room’s attention.

“Lastly we have Captain Steve Rogers.” The agent announced proudly, watching them for their reactions. A round of befuddled glances were exchanged.

“Um, that’s nice?” Ventured Clint.

“He’s Captain America.” Coulson exasperated.

“No way.” Dr. Banner exclaimed softly, staring at Rogers now.

“Sure he is Coulson.” Natasha threw a doubtful look at the older agent.

“Interesting. So who finally cracked the Super Soldier Serum? I thought the government banned work on it after… Well, you know.” He shrugged, didn’t seem fair to point fingers. He’s made plenty of mistakes himself after all.

“He’s telling the truth, I really am Captain America. I was frozen in ice for seventy years, apparently, and somehow managed to survive.” The Captain explained earnestly.

They all watched him silently for a moment.

“Well I’ll be damned; dad’s Capsicle is real after all.” Mused Tony, scratching at his goatee.

“Ha! Capsicle.” Everyone stared at Clint’s outburst, “Sorry, I’m wired today for some reason.”

“Uh-oh, which coffee carafe did you use this morning?” He watched Clint think about it.

“The one with the red handle.”

“Oh, yeah. I had that one set-up to brew with like ten caffeine pills in it.”

“And what, exactly, were you doing at Stark’s this morning, agent Barton?” Fury asked as he entered the room. A huge man with long blond hair and strange clothing was next to him.

“Well, you see sir,” Clint started.

“What two people are friends,” Continued Tony with a shit eating grin.

“And they like each other very, very much,”

“They tend to hang out,”

“And sometimes even-“

“Alright, enough!” Fury cut them off and rolled his eye at them. He moved to the head of the table by Coulson,

“Now, this big guy here is your last teammate, I’ll let him introduce himself.”

“Hail, fellow warriors! I am Thor Odinson of Asgard. I look forward to winning victory and glory by your side.” Boomed the newcomer, a large grin on his face. The team sat in stunned silence, surprised by how loud the man was.

“So, where exactly is Asgard? I’ve never heard of it before.” Steve inquired politely. Natasha gave him a look that said ‘oh hon’ as Thor barked out a laugh.

“You haven’t been briefed on that yet, Captain.” Coulson apologized.

Thor barked out a laugh, “Asgard is the mightiest of the Nine Realms, my friend.”

The poor guy looked utterly baffled by the explanation, and because Tony was such a nice guy, he felt like he should toss the good Captain a bone, “He’s not from Earth Cap, he’s an alien. They had those in your time, right?”

He felt offended when the man glared at him.

“I’ve been unfrozen for a couple months now, you know. You don’t need to patronize me Mr. Stark; I’ve picked up a few things.”

“Ok, ok, geesh. I just met you, you expect me to know these kinds of things?”

“I’m surprised you don’t, Stark. You hack my database every other week; the Captain’s return was big news around here.” Fury inputted.

“1) I actually hack you every couple days. I just leave a trail a couple times a month so you don’t get a) smug or b) suspicious. And 2) If it happened while I was dying of Palladium poisoning, I had more important things on my mind. Like trying to get Clint to wear tighter pants while he was pretending to be my chauffer because you guys are assholes and broke both of Harpy’s legs. I mean, Natasha pretending to be my PA wasn’t enough for you? Oh, and 3) I tend to ignore anything that was a part of my old man’s projects, so that might have been part of it.”

“I seem to recall one of his ‘projects’ saving your life recently.” Fury retorted smugly.

“Yeah, and you’re never going to let me live it down, I get it. Are we done here?” Tony shoved to his feet and glared at the Colonel. The man stared at him calculating.

“Tell me what you know about the Avenger Initiative.”

“Six person team of skilled or super powered people to act like a first response team for major threats that the army isn’t equipped to deal with.”

Fury narrowed his eye at him before sliding a slim tablet down to him, “Good enough for me. Don’t need you smarting off anymore, get out of here and do your homework. Meet on the Helicarrier at ten am this Saturday, bring the suit.”

“Yes mom.” Tony sassed, picking up the tablet and shoving it under his arm, “When you ids are done having fun here, part at my place! Think of it as a team bonding exercise or some bull.”

With a flourished bow, he backed out of the room and headed to the elevators. As he walked, he pulled an earpiece out of his pocket and put it in his ear.

“Hey, Jarvis?”

“Yes Sir?”

“Have ten pizzas delivered to the tower in like an hour and a half.”

“May I inquire as to why you are ordering so many pizzas Sir?”

“We may or may not be having company tonight. Either way, Pepper and Clint will be around, Natasha too probably. We can just take however many pizzas we don’t eat and go around handing slices out to those guys over on Murddock or something.”

“Very good Sir. Mr. Hogan is waiting outside to take you home.”

The elevator arrived to take him down.

“Jarvis, you’re awesome.” Tony told his AI as he stepped onto the lift. Once the doors shut he turned the tablet in his hands on. He scanned through the information on it. When the lift reached the lobby, he was still reading. He headed outside without looking up at all, engrossed with his new teammates’ files. He approached a parked car, where Happy was holding the door open for him. The other man greeted him as he slid into the back seat, grunting an acknowledgement. A few minutes after the car pulled away from the curb, he tossed the tablet to the side and sighed.

“New S.H.I.E.L.D. project, sir?” Happy inquired, glancing back through the rear view.

Tony snorted a little, “Something like that.”

The rest of the drive was quiet, Happy minding the road and Tony trying to figure out how he was going to deal with these people.

Clint and Natasha wouldn’t be a problem, seeing as he knew both of them already and trusted them for the most part (except Natasha. He didn’t trust her to not stab him randomly or something, but he felt that was how she wanted it). And they both knew about him and his… quirks.

Banner wouldn’t be too hard to get along with, because of science reasons. And the whole genius in his own right thing didn’t hurt either. Sure, there was the whole Hulk thing, but even the potential injury, or you know, possibly getting killed thing wasn’t that huge a deterrent for him. Obviously the guy had it under control for the most part.

Then there was Thor. He wasn’t sure about him yet. Granted, he’d only just been introduced to the guy, hadn’t had any actually interaction with him yet. He seemed likeable enough.

And of course there was Steve Rogers to consider. The sweet little (big), naïve Super Soldier, out of his own time and thrown into the future. Not to mention hot as all hell, can’t forget that. Oh, and he’s Captain fucking America. Tony couldn’t decide whether he wanted to kiss him or punch him senseless.

Before he could think any further on the matter, the car came to a stop.

“Home sweet home, sir.” Happy announced, putting the vehicle in park and getting out to open Tony’s door for him. He picked up the discarded tablet and scooted out.

“Hey, wanna come up for some pizza?” He asked the man.

“Nah, rain check? Going to watch a fight with a few buddies tonight.” Happy said apologetically.

“No problem man,” Tony patted him on the shoulder before walking away backwards, “Why don’t you take tomorrow, if Pepper doesn’t need you for anything. I’m probably going to be in the Garage all day anyways.”

“Thanks Tony, see ya!” The chauffer got in the car and drove off.

Turning to walk normal, Tony entered his tower. As he headed for his private elevator, he realized how much he really didn’t like them. Confined, slow, but mostly boring. The thought immediately gave him an idea for some sort of repulsor lift. Who wouldn’t want to fly up fifty stories to their office?

“Not as many as you would think, Sir.” Jarvis’ voice stated from above, “And yes, you were thinking out loud again.”

“Huh. _Really_ need to work on that.”

“That would probably be wise Sir. Would you like a briefing on what has transpired in your absence?”

“Uh-oh, what happened?”

“Dum-e had a slight malfunction, half the lab is now covered in smoothies.”

“I was only gone like two hours! Ugh, whatever. Have Butterfingers and U start cleaning it up, I’ll be down as soon as I change.”

“Already done Sir.”

He sighed and stepped out of the elevator when it reached the penthouse level. As he walked into the living room, he pulled at his tie until it came off. Pepper mustn’t have finished her work yet, seeing as she wasn’t in her usual spot on the couch. Heading into his room he quickly changed out of his suit and into some jeans and a long sleeve/t-shirt combo that dulled the glow of the Arc reactor.

Making his way back to the living room, there was still no sign of Pepper, so he headed straight down to the workshop. After punching in his code, he entered and just stood looking around in disgust. His main work bench was covered in what was probably a raspberry or strawberry smoothie, something that was pink anyways. The kitchenette was drenched in a variety of blended fruits and vegetables. His bots had managed to get the floor clean and were working on the walls.

“What the hell did he do?” He groaned, scrubbing a hand over his face.

“Uncertain. I have been unable to connect to his servos to ascertain what went wrong.” The AI informed him.

“Probably that last upgrade I gave his programming. Where is he now?” He asked as he walked further into the shop and to his work bench.

“After he finished his… task, he returned to his charging station and has remained there.”

Tony picked up a screwdriver with two fingers, holding it away from him as he watched smoothie drip off it in disgust.

“Alright. I’ll get to work on cleaning this mess up, then I’ll take a look at Dum-e when I’m done.” He let the screwdriver fall back onto the table, “Jarvis, music. And let Pepper and Clint know where I am when they get here.”

“Of course Sir.” Metallica came blasting through the speakers as Tony got to work.


End file.
